I PUT THE HOUSECAT OUTSIDE FOR TWO GODDAMN MINUTES AS A JOKE AND HE COMES RUNNING IN WITH A SNAKE IN HIS MOUTH
OH SHIT THE SNAKE IS STILL ALIVE
THE SNAKE HAS GONE INTO THE LAUNDRY ROOM AND IM ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS
SNAKE HAS BEEN RELEASED IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD IN A PANICKED, THROWING MOTION
"Fucking put me outside again, bitch. See what happens." -My Asshole Cat
If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.
Why the fuck would I do that
im a bad person who thinks bad thoughts like ‘ew what is that girl wearing’ and then remember that im supposed to be positive about all things and then think ‘no she can wear what she wants, fuck what other people say damn girl u look fabulous’ and im just a teeny bit hypocritical tbh
I was always taught by my mother, That the first thought that goes through your mind is what you have been conditioned to think. What you think next defines who you are.
Arab Little Red Riding Hood with a red hijab
A Japanese Snow White with her coveted pale skin and shiny black hair
Mexican Cinderella with colorful Mexican glass blown slippers
Greek Beauty and the Beast where Beast is a minotaur
Culture-bent fairy tales that keep key canonical characteristics
A character can still be a great character without being a good person.
In fact, some of the best characters are terrible people.
Because a character’s worth should be based on how complex and interesting they are, not their morality if they were real.
i want to write a movie about a girl with depression who meets a boy and they become friends and thats it. he’s just another friend. she goes to therapy and learns to love herself and saves herself. because thats how it happens. thats real life. you’re the hero. you can save yourself.
literally bob singer: we’ve got a good beginning of the season, but as far as the last half…
It’s important to make friendships that are deeper than gossiping and drinking and smoking and going out.
Make friends who you can go get breakfast with, make friends you can cry with, make friends who support your life goals and believe in you.